


The last thing he ever did

by pensandwings



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angelic Grace, Confrontations, Demon Dean Winchester, Kissing, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-08-12
Updated: 2014-08-12
Packaged: 2018-02-12 22:30:04
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,641
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2126889
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pensandwings/pseuds/pensandwings
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Was he actually afraid of Dean? The man who had saved him countless times? He gripped the door knob tight with his hand. It felt slick with his sweat and found the answer deep in the pit of his stomach. He pushed the door open. Light filled the hallway as Dean turned his head, flashing a smirk. He sat in the corner, his feet up on the desk. In his hand he held a blade, sharpening it with his other. “Well hey there angel,” Dean’s voice rang, his gaze turning back to the weapon in hand. “Come to join the party?”</p>
            </blockquote>





	The last thing he ever did

Blackness stretched out far ahead of him, the only light shining out the bottom of the door frame. But that was far away, and Cas stood rigid at the end of the hall. Courage was such a rare human emotion and Cas was finding it hard to muster it. He knew what stood behind the door, and he didn’t trust it or himself. Yet he found himself walking, step by step, closer to it. His heart was pounding in his chest with fear. Was he actually afraid of Dean? The man who had saved him countless times? He gripped the door knob tight with his hand. It felt slick with his sweat and found the answer deep in the pit of his stomach. He pushed the door open. Light filled the hallway as Dean turned his head, flashing a smirk. He sat in the corner, his feet up on the desk. In his hand he held a blade, sharpening it with his other. “Well hey there angel,” Dean’s voice rang, his gaze turning back to the weapon in hand. “Come to join the party?”

Cas wasn’t scared anymore. The sweat dried from his hands, the sickness went hard in his stomach. He felt cold, drained. The man he had once raised from hell, now sat in front of him, dragged back down. He had failed.

“I only came to see if it was true.” Cas said flatly, hardening the warm voice he usually saved for Dean. He turned, fully intending to walk out of the room, and away from the monster that consumed the body he had once rebuilt. But Dean’s voice came protesting after him.

“Oh come on,” He cooed, “I was only joking; you used to love my jokes.” He rose from the chair, placing the blade on the table.

“I do not find this situation humorous,” Cas glared. Dean stalked closer, his walk was predatory.

“Really,” he laughed “’cause I happen to find it darn right hilarious.” He came right up to Cas’ face, inches apart. His green eyes shone behind pale lashes, but something was missing. The light Cas had always seen there was gone. It had turned foggy and faded. “Best buddies, Cas and Dean, an angel and a demon,” his tongue flicked out the words like venom, “saving people, hunting things.” He backed Cas against the wall, his hand coming up beside Cas’ face. “Priceless,” he whispered, flashing his smile.

Cas tried to ignore the usual pang he got in his chest when Dean got close to him. He had to remind himself this wasn’t Dean anymore. Dean was gone.

“We are not friends,” Cas gruffed out, averting his gaze from the ones peering down on him.

“Well that’s not what you said before.” Dean cocked his head to the side, “I thought you’d watch over me angel.” His voice broke Cas’ resolve, his new found human emotions took over him. “I thought you did everything for me?” He felt all the sadness and pain he had pushed down. That quickly turned red, anger boiling over the surface.

Dean’s eyes flashed black as Cas reached out to grab his arm, spinning it around to pin him face first against the wall. His arm was pulled tightly behind his back. He shouted in Dean’s ear. “I would have done anything for him. I gave up everything for him,” His voice wavered, “I would have died for him.” His heart hurt. Countless times since he had found out had he thought of and wished for an alternate ending. One where Cas would give anything, his everything to stop this from happening.

“But you are not him.” Cas said, realizing he had been lost in his own pain again. He pushed hard against Dean, shoving him into the wall as he stepped back. He pinched the bridge of his nose against the tips his fingers.

“But I am,” Deans voice whispered. “Same brain,” Cas turned to face him, “same body.” Dean reached up to wipe the blood from the fresh cut marking his cheek. “Same heart.” He licked the tips of his finger, sucking off the red and making a smacking nose with his lips.

“I don’t see how that is relevant.” Cas peered at him.

“Well it should be,” Dean tried, “since a lot of it involves you.” Dean was the one to look away now. He leaned back against the wall.

“I don’t understand.” Cas didn’t know why he stayed. Every instinct was telling him to leave the room or exorcise the thing in front of him. Yet his feet stood frozen in place, because despite everything it was Dean’s face staring back at him.

“You can’t tell me you didn’t know.” Dean said flashing his eyes green again. Cas’ face must have given him his answer. Dean laughed, dark and hard. “Wow, you’re denser than I thought.”

No words escaped Cas’ mouth. He stood motionless. He hated himself for not being able to do anything but stand there with a dumbfound expression on his face. It seemed like the silence went on forever, until Dean slunk slowly off the wall. He walked over to Cas again, faces separated by a breath. “You’re almost human again, aren’t you Cas?” His words came out on hot breath. The hairs lining Cas’ face pricked at the heat. “You’re starting to feel things again.”

Dean’s hands traveling upwards, pulling at the bottom of Cas’ tie. Dean pulled his face beside Cas’ ear, whispering into his neck. He wrapped his fist in the blue fabric dangling from Cas’ dean, gripping Cas to him. “What does it feel like when I do this?” Dean asked. Every nerve his Cas’ body was on fire. He felt elated and sick at the same time. His heart pounded loud in his ears. The heat from his face spread down throughout his body. He knew this was wrong, this wasn’t Dean. Yet he couldn’t bring himself to move. “It feels nice doesn’t it?” he sucked deeply. He unravelled his hand from Cas’ tie, sliding it across his chest and under the collar of his coat. “This is how I felt every time I used to look at you.”

Cas couldn’t stop his eyes from widening. He could feel Deans smile on his skin. The hitch in his throat blocked off any sense he had left. He raised his hands from his sides, clutching the opening of Dean’s jacket. “I used to think about touching you,” Dean continued. “I would think about the noises you would make if I did.” Despite his intentions, a little gasp escaped Cas’ mouth. Dean hummed in approval.

Cas was practically shaking as Dean’s hand kept exploring Cas’ chest. “I wouldn’t have ever told you if it wasn’t for the demon juice running through me, as badly as I wanted to.” Dean pushed Cas back. He stumbled back, his hand colliding with the desk behind him. Dean followed, circling Cas with his arms, he clutched the wood.

His eyes roamed Cas’ face. The blue eyes making him twitch all over. The feeling was so much more intense than he had remembered; wanting him. He just didn’t care now, about anything. He couldn’t ignore the lust in his chest, driving him forward. The look he was getting was just too helpless for him to even think about stopping. He had him right where he had wanted him for so long.

“Come on angel,” he whispered, licking his lips. “I know you want this too.” He inched closer, sucking in every whimper and breath Cas would give him. “I need you,” rolled in his chest.

Cas couldn’t take it anymore. He twisted his fingers through Dean’s hair, pulling his mouth to his. It was a forceful peck, Cas’ pulling away but with Dean’s mouth following after it. He slammed his body into Cas’, fisting his hands in the tan fabric just below his waist. His mouth catching Cas’ lips and tasting the sweetness there. Fire pumped through his veins. His head felt light, and he pulled at fabric and hair. He pulled his lips from the angel’s, replacing them on the underside of his chin. He nipped slowly down Cas’ neck. The groans being huffed out urged him on. Dean’s lips met Cas’ again, kissing him roughly, he balled his hand in his hair. He pulled Cas’ face back, peering over him. He took in the sight of Cas’ looking so disheveled. His lips were pink and swollen and his hair stood in every direction. Dean noticed his eyes though, they looked hard and unforgiving.

Cas whipped his arm around, tightly gripping the blade from the desk. Freshly sharpened, the knife drew blood as Cas held it tightly against Dean’s neck. Anger poured into Dean’s stomach. Cas stared hard at him.

He couldn’t deny enjoying what had just unfolded, but he knew that this was wrong. This wasn’t the Dean that he knew. He had to get him back. “Do it,” he snarled out. Cas’ knew he couldn’t bring himself to dig the blade into his neck. “No.” he answered cold and flat. He moved, walking so Dean stood where we once did. His back was to the door, and he dropped the blade, taking a step towards it. “You need me and I promised to watch over you. I may have failed but I swear I will get you back. No matter what it takes, you will be saved.” He slammed the door behind him, stepping into the darkness. Slamming and yelling shook the door behind him. Dean’s booming voice was murderous. Cas clenched his fists leaving another sliver of grace in his footsteps. He knew he was fading fast, but he had never been more set on anything.

He would save Dean, if it was the last thing he ever did.


End file.
